Friday June 27th - Day 1
5:36 AM - I wake up because of a noise in our bedroom. I look over and it's Kitty sitting on the window sill, excitedly watching
birds, wagging her tail around, and knocking the blinds into each other. Thanks a lot Kitty, I'm sure I'll be able to catch up on
sleep this weekend with a bunch of decathletes sleeping over. She obviously wasn't around for year one when Spaceballs quotes and
the resulting laughter kept me up past 3am every night. A couple hours later, after getting out of bed I write in my notebook:
"Kitty = Ass-clown".
7:53 AM - I got back to sleep after pushing Kitty off the window sill but woke up again a couple times. I'm getting bored of lying
in bed and anxious to start setting up for the festivities so I get out of bed. I follow my usual morning routine by talking to
Emma for a bit, petting Kitty a little, going to the kitchen for water, and then down to the basement to check email and surf the
internet.
8:36 AM - A lot of meals claim to be the breakfast of champions but the breakfast of this pseudo champion is two pieces of wheat
toast with peanut butter and a tall glass of orange juice. A great way to start the day.
8:43 AM - I'm still eating and messing around on the computer when Renae logs onto Yahoo Messenger. She sums up what I assume
everyone involved is thinking this morning by declaring that she is "definitely giddy".
9:20 AM - Emma and I are finally shaking off the last of the sleepiness, time to head upstairs to shower and get dressed. There's
not going to be much time to relax and enjoy some quiet time for the next three days so it's probably a good idea to get a slow
start to today. Plus laziness always pays off now.
9:52 AM - After shaving, brushing my teeth, and showering it's time to make the first crucial decision of Decathlon weekend: what
to wear for day one. I'd like to think that this is one of the key advantages I have in the Decathlon, easy access to my entire
wardrobe all weekend. This allows me a great deal of clothing flexibility and the ability to make last minute adjustments as the
situation warrants it. After pondering the positives and negatives of a few possible shirt selections, I decide to go with my
blue Italian soccer jersey and pair it with khaki shorts. I got the jersey last year during our Italy vacation so it's got a nice
"newness" factor to it I think. Plus, I had a really good day in Vegas a couple weeks ago when I wore this jersey so hopefully we
get a repeat performance. Finally, any reference to soccer tends to irritate most of the other competitors in the Decathlon so
any bit I can distract my opponents is a plus for me. I feel like I'm winning already.
9:58 AM - With Emma's help, I begin to clean, setup, and otherwise get the house ready for the decathletes to arrive. We need to
straighten up the kitchen, living room, and foosball/dining room, clean the bathrooms, clean and setup the garage, and clear some
space in the refrigerator. We had done some work earlier in the week so we make quick progress through the house.
10:31 AM - Erik calls me on my cell phone to ask for my address. This is amusing since he's already been to my house several times
in the past but he still either asks for directions ahead of time or gets lost. I particularly enjoyed the time a couple years ago
when Erik drove by my house a couple times while my birthday party was going on before finally realizing it was indeed my house.
Good times. I give him the correct address and he says he's on his way. It's safe to say he won't be the first person here.
10:42 AM - Not surprisingly the honor of first to arrive goes to Todd who sports a downright jubilant mood when I answer the door.
It will be an overused word today but I can't help it, we are so giddy. Todd brings in his possessions and claims his spot in the
corner of the dining room. He accompanies me downstairs where we bask in our giddiness and I print out the official scoring sheets
and rules.
11:00 AM - Robbie, Andrew, Steve, and Jim Tamburo all arrive in quick succession all carrying supplies for the weekend as well as
their food/beverage assignments that Todd divvied out earlier in the week. An amusing highlight occurs when Robbie brings in a
large watermelon as part of her food assignment. She sets it down and Kitty immediately comes to investigate. Several witnesses
describe her reaction to the watermelon as anywhere from frightened to downright terrified. Our cat is very strange.
11:17 AM - Dan, Rob, and Renae arrive. I suddenly have a flash of inspiration that I could take advantage of the opportunity to
collect NCAA pool entry fees from people who hadn't paid yet. I go downstairs, load up the software I use to run the pool, and
prepare a sticky note with the people who still owe me. Hosting the Decathlon pays, literally in this case.
11:25 AM - I put together the clipboard with the official score sheets and rules and I hand it to Renae, the official Decathlon
scorekeeper. She reacts to the clipboard like a starving person to bread, I'm probably lucky I didn't lose finger in that exchange.
11:32 AM - Reuer and Matthew arrive with Reuer proudly showing off his "Decathlon mustache". It appears to be a nice porno
mustache with the middle cut out, sort of like a reverse Hitler mustache. It might be a little hard to picture, but it's even
harder to picture why someone would intentionally wear it. I guess when you're the defending champ you feel like you can pull
anything off. I totally should've shaved my head for the 2003 Decathlon, I could've set a great precedent right there.
11:35 AM - The first jokes about Paul being late to the day's events are made, let's call that Decathlon Tradition #5. In response
I declare that with the new rule of starting events even if people are late, I might actually beat Paul in bowling if he misses
the first game. Several people (including me) quickly point out that Paul would probably have to miss some or most of game two
and possibly some of game three for me to be assured a victory. Jokes involving me and bowling: Decathlon Tradition #8.
11:37 AM - I make myself a small turkey and ham sandwich for lunch while everyone is hanging around, having random conversations.
I don't hear all of it but I pick up some of a discussion about the movie Atonement, Keira Knightley, and her hotness compared to a
couple other actresses. That's it.
11:43 AM - Barely ten minutes at the house and Reuer is already playing/messing with the cat. It's hard to tell if Kitty loves or
hates Reuer since she sits there and takes the harassment and never runs away. It's certainly possible that she's simply too dumb
to realize that she can just walk away.
11:48 AM - Everyone's gathered in the living room and kitchen, Reuer and others are telling stories, and everyone's laughing. Good
times. I write in my notebook: "This is what the Decathlon is all about."
11:53 AM - Fernando walks in and puts a box of bite-size donuts on the counter. I immediately think that those are guaranteed to be
flying around the room at some point this weekend.
11:55 AM - I go upstairs to get my keys and money, getting ready to leave for the Brunswick Zone. I come back into the kitchen and
I'm informed that Dan went 2 for 3 in catching donuts in his mouth. That didn't take long.
11:58 AM - Everyone's gathering their bowling equipment and piling into cars to head over to bowling. I may be biased but I think
I look a lot cooler carrying just my pool cues. Someone walks by with a bowling bag they're obviously either going bowling or on a
trip with some small, odd looking baggage. I walk by with my pool case and I could be doing anything. Maybe I'm going to play pool,
maybe I'm carrying a sniper rifle and going to assassinate someone, or I might be heading over to ninja sword fighting class. You
just never know. One thing's for certain, I wish I wasn't going bowling.
12:00 PM - We leave the house and (Puff) Drag, Peter, Paul, and (Mary) Erik are missing. I jump in the back seat of Robbie's car
and Erik calls my cell phone again. He's on Route 59 and shockingly is asking where to go next. I give him the route to the
Brunswick Zone and he's all good.
12:09 PM - Peter and Drag also meet us at the bowling alley, no Paul yet. We walk in and are greeted by three or four birthday
parties going on and about a quarter of a million kids. Fantastic. Todd "pays" for our bowling with the stack of free game passes
he gathers every year and everyone heads over to our lanes. Everyone, that is, except for us losers who don't have our own bowling
shoes (or winners, depending on how you look at it). Erik, Rob, Andrew, and I get our snazzy bowling shoes from the desk and begin
searching the house balls for our weapons of choice. One of these years I'm going to find a one pound ball and throw it down the
alley overhand. Then bowling would be cool. Maybe not cool, but cooler.
12:15 PM - I'm sitting at the table with Renae while everyone else throws practice balls and has bowling conversations that I'm
unable and unwilling to pay attention to. A couple people ask me if I'm going to throw any practice balls and I respond with my
best Allen Iverson impersonation: "We talking about PRACTICE?" I explain that my primary goal in the bowling event is to avoid
injury and the best way to do that is to throw as few balls down the alley as necessary. I'm not going to get many strikes to keep
my throw total down so I need to cut down where I can. Besides, throwing a couple practice balls isn't going to help me at this point.
12:19 PM - Renae explains bowling "oil patterns" to me a little and says that practicing allows people to make their path through
the oil better. She also mentions that people like me who throw straight balls can affect the oil patterns for the real bowlers.
I am absolutely delighted by this news. It gives me a whole new sense of accomplishment, something I can be happy with even if I
don't get a mark in a frame. When it comes to bowling, I'll take anything I can get.
12:22 PM - After taking a practice frame, Rob winces in pain and has a slight limp walking back to the table. Apparently Rob took a
fall on the stairs at home last week and broke two toes, one on each foot. That's got to suck. We'll see how that affects his
pseudo athletic prowess this weekend, he seems to be confident he'll pull through. He's a doctor and all so I think I'll trust him.
Next, Erik comes over and informs me that he's equally ready to get bowling over with. He mentions that he's actually bowled twice
since last year's Decathlon and I disgustedly accuse him of practicing. Erik denies that it counts as practicing but he does admit
to practicing for HORSE by taking on eight and nine year old kids in basketball at the gym. Apparently he even wins some times,
good for him.
12:27 PM - Matthew kicks off the bowling event by going 9, spare. He's our early leader.
12:29 PM - My turn in the first frame comes up and I throw a nice straight ball down for a strike. Who needs practice? As I walk
back to my seat Renae suggests I should quit now. I wish.
12:32 PM - I follow up my first frame strike with 7 on the first ball and then a gutter ball. See? If I would've thrown a practice
ball I would've missed out on ten pins. I totally know what I'm doing here.
12:38 PM - Todd surveys our four lanes and makes a declaration that Erik is the best dressed Decathlete, not a surprise victory.
However, Tamburo angrily disputes this pointing out his white "dress socks" rising out of his bowling shoes. Todd is not impressed
enough to change his decision.
12:39 PM - After a strike in the fourth frame I take a look at the scores and calculate that I'm on pace to beat two people: the guy with
two broken toes (Rob) and the guy who hasn't shown up yet (Paul). I'll take it!
12:40 PM - I spend a few moments thinking about another part of bowling that annoys me. Pretty much whenever you get a spare or
strike (which for me is rare but most of the time for the real bowlers) as you're walking back from the alley almost everyone
reaches over to give you a fist bump or a low five or other hand-related congratulations. Seriously? Someone with a 200+ average
gets a spare in the fourth frame and deserves congratulations from everyone in the group? That's like me spiking a ping-pong ball
down the corner to make the score 5-2 in the first game of a ping-pong match and then going around the garage getting fist bumps
from everyone. Silliness.
12:52 PM - I have a particularly nice seventh frame when I start with a gutter ball and then get four pins on the second ball.
Walking back I respectfully decline handshakes from Larsen and Rob, not because I'm upset but because I had turned around before
the fourth pin fell. A three pin frame doesn't deserve the fist bumps but four is a totally different story.
12:57 PM - As I throw my first ball in the eighth frame a little girl on the neighboring lane (an actual little girl, I'm not
referring to Bill) runs up and wildly chucks her bowling ball down their bumper-ed alley. This might have agitated and/or screwed
up a real bowler, but me? I get a strike. Afterwards I contemplate offering her an order of nachos and a large soda to do that
every frame, I might be unstoppable. Also, as I'm walking back to my seat I hear that Paul is on his way finally thanks to his
meeting at work finishing. Our jobs would be a lot better if they didn't interfere with life so much.
1:02 PM - In the foursome on my lanes, I'm slotted behind Drag so naturally when he's finishing I walk up toward the lane and
"get ready". I put that in quotes because for me getting ready to bowl essentially involves me standing near the lane, looking at
the ball rack to find my ball, and then waiting for opportunities to make jokes and sarcastic remarks. This particular time, I
have the following thoughts in my head as I'm waiting: "Hmm, Drag's still up there… (look somewhere else for a little bit)… Good
gravy, Drag is STILL going, what the hell?? (confused looking around)… Oh, it's the tenth frame… That makes sense."
1:09 PM - I have an average (for me) tenth frame and finish with a 112 in the first game. That's not a great score but it's not a
disaster considering my usual performance. Bill's 133 and Paul's 0 however…
1:28 PM - Plodding along in the second game, I'm bowling fairly average. I blame that girl who isn't running up while I throw
anymore, she's killing me. Meanwhile, Rob makes an impressive move by opening the second game strike, strike, spare, strike. After
the strike in the fourth frame, Renae yells out "So Sexy!" Rob responds while receiving fist bumps and handshakes "We'll be
leaving after this event."
1:33 PM - Notebook entry after the fifth frame: "I can't wait for this to be over."
1:48 PM - In the eight frame I'm left with just the seven pin after the first ball. Despite a valiant effort I fail to knock the
pin down. As I'm walking back I explain to several people "It's hard when there's only one pin."
2:00 PM - I finish a little strong in the second game and end up with a 133. Rob and Erik are way ahead of me so it'll be Andrew
and me fighting it out for last. I have him by twenty-four pins after two games and I'd like to think I can hold him off, but we
are talking about me and bowling here so anything is possible. Paul arrived as we were finishing the second game and after a
quick series of votes it's decided that he can bowl all three games but has to take a ten pin penalty in each game for being late.
I voted against the penalty despite my ruined dreams of beating Paul in bowling.
2:13 PM - Four frames into the last game and Reuer is leading the group by a small margin. It's getting tighter down at the
bottom too with Andrew making a run at me for fifteenth. I know it's the same thing in this case but doesn't "fifteenth" sound a
lot better than "second to last"? I think so.
2:21 PM - Andrew's group is a frame ahead of my group so I either have the advantage of knowing what I need to do to stay in front
or the disadvantage with the pressure of knowing exactly how I can screw up to fall behind. I'm not sure which but considering
this is bowling I would tend to be skeptical of me having any sort of advantage. That skepticism grows after Andrew leaves opens
in the fifth and sixth frames allowing me to build a lead again… and I miss an easy spare in the fifth. I'm up two pins after five.
2:24 PM - I'm stupid again in the sixth frame and miss another spare. Still up two pins. Can't you just feel the drama building?
We're headed for a fantastic, wild finish for last place! Bowling! I love this game!
2:29 PM - I love it even more after I score a clutch strike in the seventh frame. It's so clutch I write the word "CLUTCH" in my
notebook since Andrew had gotten spares in his seventh and eighth frames.
2:30 PM - As I'm standing by the table in between frames I look down the alleys and make eye contact with Bill who's standing at
the other end. We simultaneously give each other the middle finger. That should be a statistic we track, most middle fingers
given and received.
2:34 PM - I'm saddened to discover that Renae tore through her order of nachos before I could steal even one chip. That's
disappointing. Less disappointing is my clutch spare in the eighth after Andrew spares in his ninth frame. I'm up by five pins.
2:37 PM - I miss another single pin and leave an open in the ninth frame. This is bad.
2:41 PM - I'm saved by Andrew falling flat with an open in the tenth frame, now I need a mark plus four pins to secure the
glorious victory and fifteenth place. The pressure is on.
2:47 PM - I throw my first ball in the tenth frame and I knock down nine pins with the last pin wobbling just a bit in an
obnoxious effort to mock my pain. I am indeed mocked but I recover quickly to smoothly throw a perfect second ball to smash the
pin to the back of the alley. There's the critical mark that's evaded me two of the last four frames. I celebrate just a little
while I wait for the ball return, secure in the knowledge that all I need is four pins from the next ball to avoid last place. My
ball gets spit up and out of the return, I pick it up, line up, walk my approach to the alley, swing the ball back, and…
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I pull one of those horrible slip the ball off the side of my hand throws and it tumbles into the
right gutter barely halfway down the alley closely followed by my one point for fifteenth place. Good gravy. I turn around with
a pained but slightly amused look on my face as people react to the ugliness. Andrew celebrates while everyone else is split
between abject pity for me and laughter. Definitely NOT good times.
2:50 PM - I quickly change out of the dorky bowling shoes and return them to the front desk. At least bowling is finished, which
is always my favorite part of bowling. That and not hurting myself. Despite the thirty pin penalty, Paul still finishes in first
with Reuer in second. We all migrate to the pool room, get four tables, and wait for first round assignments. Pool and air hockey
get started.
3:00 PM - I'll be playing in one of the first pool matches against Dan. I lose the rock, scissors, paper throw and Dan decides
to break. As I'm racking he informs me that his strategy for this match is to wear me down. Dan: "I have more pool stamina than
most." I'm not sure what this means but I'm not too worried.
3:04 PM - Drag is playing on the table next to us and while he is lining up a shot he backs his cue into the neighborhood of Rob's
crotch. Rob's sitting in one of the seats against the wall and responds "I know, it's a big target." Ah yes, the hilarity of
billiards jokes.
3:13 PM - It seems Dan is actually following his ping-pong strategy since he's playing a lot of defense with his shots. It's not
enough though and I win the first game.
3:34 PM - The second game is closer and near the end I go on a nice run making my last three balls in succession and set up for a
nice shot on the eight ball. And then I miss terribly. Too often in pool, that's how I roll. Dan makes his last ball but misses a
long shot on the eight. I'm left with a long shot on the eight too but I make a really nice cut into the corner. I win 2-0 and I'm
on to the second round.
3:37 PM - While waiting for my next match I ponder getting some nachos. I decide to wait.
3:42 PM - I'm sitting and watching Paul and Bill play their first round pool match. I have the winner of this match in pool and I
play Paul in the first round of air hockey. I write in my notebook: "That's two shitty draws right there."
3:49 PM - As a side note, Rob has a huge medical board test next week that he's been studying forever for so he brought his backpack
full of study materials to the bowling alley with him. I'm still waiting for a match when we notice that Dan is sitting in the corner
looking through one of Rob's medical study books. I ask him what he's reading and Dan innocently replies "It was open to the
gynecology section!" I make a comment to the group that Dan's looking for pictures and Reuer takes the discussion to an entirely
new level by asking "Where's the scratch-n-sniff section?" There are some groans and laughter followed by a discussion that I won't
detail here. You can use your imagination if you really want.
4:01 PM - Bill finishes defeating Paul in pool so I'll be facing Bill, but first I play Paul in air hockey. This should be a hard
fought battle, I've played Paul several times over the years and they've always been close. As preparation for the match I eat some
of Emma's nachos. Mmmmmmmm nachos…
4:22 PM - I survive a great air hockey match with Paul and win in three games: 7-3, 3-7, 7-4. We traded wins in the first two games
but I think a slight defensive adjustment I made in the third game helps me recover. Paul kept nailing straight shots past me so I
pushed my paddle out further away from my goal to cut down the angle. My make-believe air hockey coach broke down the game film of
game two and designed a great strategy in response. I think it's safe to say this is one of the early contenders for dorkiest entry
of day one. Dan is up next in air hockey.
4:43 PM - Dan isn't as good offensively as Paul but his defense is very strong (again, like ping-pong). I manage to sneak in just
enough goals to win in two games: 7-5, 7-6. Another close match but I feel like I'm playing well. I love air hockey, I need to get
my own table and then invent a robot to play me anytime I want. And then I can work on teleportation.
4:55 PM - Now it's time to play Bill in pool and he's already listing out excuses and we haven't even started yet. He tells me about
his sore elbow and shoulder while I act concerned. Now I know Bill had to retire from the last day of the Decathlon last year because
of a bad back, but he just bowled three games and is moving around fine so I think he can survive another pool match. He's not that
old, yet.
5:19 PM - Sadly I lose a decent match to Bill: 0-2. We both played well the first game but Bill went on a really nice run to make a
few balls including the eight. I had a chance to win the second game but I missed a tough bank shot on the eight, Bill ended up
making it instead a turn later. I played well and Bill's clearly improved from playing in his league so I'm not too disappointed.
The first of two highlights from the match occurred when I gave a quick fist pump after making a shot but then I quickly realized I
had left the cue ball in a terrible position. After Todd suggested I take the fist pump back I made a reverse fist pump (fist punch?)
motion to the delight of the crowd. Later Bill missed a bank shot pretty badly and exclaimed "You've got to be nut shacking me!"
The spectators and I all reacted with amused confusion, mainly because we all heard different phrases: "nut jacking", "nut sacking",
"nut shaq-ing", etc. We really couldn't decide what Bill originally meant or which of the proposed phrases were better but it was
certainly an enjoyable conversation.
5:24 PM - Next up is a losers bracket pool match with Drag and an air hockey match also with Drag. We decide to play the pool first
since a table is open. Drag beat me last year in the third place match for pool so I'm hoping to exact a little revenge, should be a
good match.
5:57 PM - I lose a long, disappointing match with Drag: 1-2. I played poorly in the first match and Drag took advantage to win that
one. In the second game I played a good series of safeties and finished with a nice run to force a third game. We both played well
in the third game and it came down to the wire. I scratched on a hard shot, trying to make my last ball and since Drag was on the
eight it was over. Drag is officially my pool nemesis, next year I'll try hitting him in the crotch with my cue. Damn, I needed to
do better in pool. I play in a league too, I have no excuse for why I haven't improved my game. I seriously need to knock a wall
down in the house and buy a pool table. Poop.
6:22 PM - I take out my frustrations by beating Drag in air hockey: 7-3, 2-7, 7-4. We took turns playing crappy games and fortunately
for me Drag went first. That makes me feel a little better but now I'm out of pool and I have to wait a while to see who I play in the
final game of the winners bracket in air hockey.
6:25 PM - I'm sitting in the pool room watching a few matches going on and stewing over losing early in pool. Not good times. Once
again, with such a poor showing in one of my supposedly better events my already extremely slim chances for a second Decathlon title
are fading away. It's certainly not unexpected but it still sucks. It's times like this where I'm so unbelievably thankful that I
won it all that first year, otherwise these disappointing moments would be so many times worse. I snap out of the moping when I realize
I'm really hungry, I should go get some bowling alley food soon.
6:47 PM - One of the matches going on is Reuer and Paul in pool, potentially a critical match in the losers bracket between the
previous two champs. Paul ends up winning the match in two games while Reuer appears to forget that we retired the Reuer Award a
couple years ago.
6:50 PM - I go over to the concession stand and order some chicken tenders and fries. It's certainly not a healthy selection but it's
quick, convenient, and hopefully tasty. While I wait for my food I sit at one of the tables there in the food area which is
surrounded by the game area. With all the noise and flashing lights, it reminds me a little of Vegas except there's a bunch of
kids running around and it's a lot less fun.
7:02 PM - The food's not too bad, basically bar food so my expectations weren't too high. They had barbeque sauce for the chicken
tenders so that's always a plus. While I'm eating my overpriced food and watching kids run around and play games I have an interesting
thought. I'm really glad there wasn't a place like this in Staunton when I was a kid. I would've definitely spent way too much time
and money playing games there and I probably would've been just as dorky and annoying as all the kids I see now. I dodged a bullet
there.
7:14 PM - I'm still waiting to play air hockey so I sit down again in the pool room and watch the matches going on. Actually, I'm more
amused by watching Todd and Bill play an exhibition game of speed pool. They look like they're having fun but they don't appear to be
as good as the people on TV, neither of which is surprising.
7:20 PM - Robbie comes into the pool room to cheers, she's sneaking in Taco Bell orders from a few people in the gym bag she's carrying
over her shoulder. As they're over in the corner divvying up food I hear someone complain "Now our tacos are going to taste like
sweat!"
7:25 PM - Rob's been studying in the bar for over two hours now. When Todd hears about this, he excitedly goes off to take a picture.
It's important to fully document all aspects of the Decathlon.
7:40 PM - I spend quite a while watching a good pool match between Bill and Erik, both of them are playing well. I remember when I
was still in pool, those were good times.
7:52 PM - After about an hour and a half of sitting I'm finally up in air hockey against Tamburo. Jim knocked me out of the losers
bracket last year in a great match so I'm looking forward to this one. The victor wins the winners bracket and can finish no worse
than second, so this is big.
8:08 PM - Vengeance is mine! I lost the first game 3-7 after knocking the puck into my own goal three times. You can probably
imagine how happy that made me. Fortunately I rebounded with a 7-6 victory in the second game. Jim was up 6-5 and I had to come
back with two straight goals, very nerve wracking. I won the third game 7-4 to cruise into the final match, now I get to wait forever
to see who I play. I was very disappointed by my air hockey performances the last couple years so this really is satisfying. Very
good times.
8:13 PM - I'm in for a long wait now so I go visit Rob still studying in the bar. We hang for a little while talking about his
upcoming test, the Decathlon, and other assorted topics. I head back to the pool room and he goes back to studying. Poor bastard.
8:33 PM - I hang out in the pool room talking to people and watching pool matches. Sitting around after coming through the winners
bracket of an event, waiting to see who you'll play is one of the best feelings in the Decathlon. It's also a key opportunity for me to
rest the first two knuckles on my right hand which take a serious beating in air hockey. I switched to a new grip this year that I
had tried out before. I think it helps my play but the bashing of the paddle on my knuckles hurts after a while. It's a small price
to pay if I keep winning.
8:39 PM - I get bored with watching pool and go over to watch the air hockey matches going on. The second fifth place match is
starting as I come over, it's Dan versus Drag. They have a back and forth first game with Dan eking out a narrow 7-6 victory. In
the second game, Drag gets a brief timeout after he bags himself on the air hockey table when reaching far for a puck. Maybe the
injury inspired him because he comes roaring back afterwards for his own 7-6 victory. The third game starts close but Dan pulls away
winning 7-3. Great match.
8:49 PM - Waiting for the next match I look around the game area and notice that one kid has been playing one of those Dance Dance
Revolution games since we finished bowling. That was almost six hours ago. This is one dedicated and extremely sweaty dancer.
8:52 PM - Next up is Dan against Reuer with Tamburo waiting for the winner and fourth place waiting for the loser. After Dan wins
the first game 7-0, Reuer calmly tosses the paddle over his shoulder and walks to the other side of the table. He's not happy.
However, Reuer scores the first goal in the second game and fake-celebrates. He's still not happy but it was entertaining for the
rest of us. It takes a good game with a marathon last point, but Dan comes out on top 7-5. One more match and I finally get to play
again.
8:58 PM - As Dan and Tamburo get ready for their match, Jim breaks out his secret weapon for today. He takes off his outer shirt to
reveal an inner shirt with the words on the front: "Who's the Coolest?" He turns around and it says on the back: "Me!" It goes
over with the crowd like a champ.
9:00 PM - Jim is certainly not the coolest after Dan beats him pretty easily in the first game 7-3. He recovers his coolest-ness by
winning the second game 7-5 but promptly loses it again by awkwardly chest bumping Dan when switching sides for the third game. Before
they start the third game, Jim kicks his shoes off. The kids in the game area must think there's a game of strip air hockey going on.
Thankfully neither player loses any more clothes and Jim comes out on top 7-3 for the two games to one victory. After an hour layoff
I play Tamburo for first place, let's get it on.
9:19 PM - Jim takes a beverage break and I spend the time focusing my mental game. Here's where winning the winners bracket is so
important, even if I lose the first best of three Jim still has to beat me in another best of three set. It certainly takes the
pressure off especially considering my historical tendency to lose that first set when I'm in this position. Not a good precedent
really.
9:56 PM - Jim wins the first two games 3-7, 6-7. Like I said, I tend to do that. I'm pretty upset with my play, especially in that
first game but it got better in the second game. We go on to the second best of three set and I try to refocus myself and concentrate
on playing better defense. Something apparently works because I win the first game 7-4. The highlight of that game is when puck
bounces off of Jim's paddle and slowly floats towards his goal. His instincts take over and he stops the puck one of his fingers and
then looks at me with a confused/innocent/annoyed look. He knocks the puck in the goal and we go on but it was amusing. Jim bounces
back with a close 7-5 victory in the second game so we go on to a final deciding game. We trade a couple goals each at the beginning
but I score a couple clutch goals to take the lead. At 6-4, the machine runs out of time and unfortunately the gaming token is also
out of credits. So we take a five minute break for me to go check the other tokens we have and then eventually go to the counter to
put more money on it. I finally come back with the token and as I'm starting the machine Jim mentions "You know after all that this
game is going to be over quick." Fortunately for me, he's correct and I score after a few shots to win 7-4.
9:59 PM -- Oh glorious victory how I've missed you. I didn't win an event for the first time in 2006 and I sadly did the same thing
last year, so before this Decathlon I was really focused on winning at least one event. Air Hockey and Foosball are my two best
events so I really wanted to win them above anything else. Mission accomplished. One down and that takes the pressure off for
Foosball. Very, very good times.
10:04 PM - I head back to the pool room where there's just a couple matches left, I ask if anyone is ready to head back to the house
and several people agree go. This is good for me since I don't have my car and I'd rather not walk. I catch a ride with Tamburo
but everyone who's leaving needs to stop at Jewel first for their food assignments so we all drive across the street to Jewel.
10:10 PM - Suddenly a full group expedition to Jewel breaks out with me, Tamburo, Todd, Dan, Paul, and Joe Conrad all stopping for
supplies. Well, I'm not buying anything but I came along for the entertainment. Joe's not in the Decathlon this year so he doesn't
have a food assignment, but he says he's buying some frozen pizzas to be counted retroactively for his food assignment last year.
Todd and I approve. In the frozen section Todd selects some pizza rolls for his own consumption, a fact he fiercely points out to
Dan who's eyeing them. Dan might be hoping for some of them to get tossed into his mouth later tonight but Todd really likes pizza
rolls so Dan may have to get his own. Meanwhile, Tamburo becomes frustrated that he can't find any frozen chocolate tacos. Jewel
has apparently let him down.
10:19 PM - We all go up front to check out and we divide into two groups to take advantage of the employee discount Jewel cards that
Dan and Joe have. The Decathlon is all about sensible shopping. While we wait in line Todd tells us about a guy he saw during his
last trip to Dominick's who opened a container of potato salad in the checkout line and started eating it by sticking his head in the
container. Apparently he was really hungry.
10:21 PM - As we're walking out to the cars, Todd notices Paul carrying two 24 packs of Mt. Dew and asks: "Are those heavy?" Paul
responds: "No, but my pants are falling down." Shockingly no one offers to help with that problem.
10:24 PM - I arrive home to find the group that left the bowling alley earlier sitting in the living room watching something on the
Game Show Network. When we walk in Peter asks who won air hockey. I respond that I did and Peter, who is my partner this year,
celebrates loudly and we exchange high fives. It's good to have another person to be excited when you win, this partners idea was a
good one.
10:37 PM - I spend about ten minutes setting up the garage for events since no one else did it. That's not too surprising though
since it's my house and all. I set up the ping-pong table and move some things out of the garage to make room for that and darts.
I finish just in time to find out that the first ping-pong match will be me against Todd. You have to love drawing someone who's
won the event three times in the first round. Fantastic.
10:56 PM - I lose to Todd in a decent match 21-16, 21-18. I played fairly well and didn't get humiliated, which is nice. It also
helped that Todd missed a few slams, but I didn't make a huge number of errors. Ping-pong is another event that I've been
disappointed with the last couple years, I'll need to modify my air hockey playing robot to play ping-pong too.
11:01 PM - I take a seat in the garage to watch Dan play a shoeless Drag in ping-pong and a darts match between Rob and Tamburo
that started during my ping-pong match and looks like it might take a week to complete. During a long volley Dan complains: "Too
many pizza rolls!"
11:12 PM - Dan beats Drag pretty quickly in ping-pong and Fernando and Peter are up next. Fernando brings out the IPod docking
station and we're treated to some nice 80's music the rest of the evening. After many rounds of shooting at bullseye Rob finally
wins the first game against Tamburo.
11:18 PM - Fernando loses the first game to Peter and as they're switching sides he proclaims that he "needs a hero". He grabs the
IPod remote and soon enough Bonnie Tyler is belting out that "he's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast…" We'll see if she can
carry Fernando to an upset victory, but the music already makes it a valiant and very entertaining attempt.
11:26 PM - Bonnie just wasn't enough and Peter wins the second game for a two games to none victory. Not surprisingly, the second
darts game is still going.
11:29 PM - Tamburo pulls out a win in the second game so they go to a third darts game. As I'm waiting for Paul and Reuer to start
their ping-pong match I notice that my two fingers busted in air hockey are not looking good. Painful? Yes. Worth the event
victory? Absolutely.
11:32 PM -- Pool has apparently finished since the last of the competitors arrive back from the bowling alley and walk up the
driveway. We find out that Bill came out of the losers bracket to win an epic rematch against Erik. See? Bill gets in a pool
league and wins the pool event for the first time, what's my problem? I need to practice.
11:33 PM - During the third game Tamburo manages to throw a dart and stick it into the end of an earlier dart. You wouldn't think
that would happen very often but we had to add a rule to the Decathlon a couple years ago stating that when it happened it counted
the same as the first dart. I guess if you play this many darts matches it's bound to happen.
11:36 PM - I realize how late it is and how loud we have the music playing so I ask someone to grab the remote and turn it down a
little bit. Renae mentions: "One of these years the cops are going to show up here." I respond: "And when they do everyone parked
on the street overnight is going to get ticketed." Hopefully we didn't just jinx the Decathlon.
11:39 PM - With "She Works Hard for the Money" playing in the background, Reuer beats Paul in ping-pong two games to none. You
guessed it, Rob and Tamburo are still playing darts.
11:44 PM - Several people are taking pictures of the festivities and Renae fails to catch me in the act of making a diary entry.
To make up for it I pose for a couple fake diary entries for her and Robbie but then I end up making this entry so I guess it wasn't
a fake pose. It's like a paradox.
11:53 PM - Rob finally hits the last couple bulls and closes Tamburo out two games to one. Hey, that only took an hour and twelve
minutes.
11:58 PM - It's almost midnight and we have one more outburst of activity with Bill playing Rob in ping-pong,
Todd versus Reuer in darts, foosball matches going on inside, and the spectators itching to play Mario Kart on the Wii.
Good times.
12:08 AM - Robbie comes out to the garage and notifies us that she lost to Larsen in foosball 10-0, 10-0. We react with some pained
expressions and she simply says that "Nothing I did felt like a shot." That about sums it up I think.
12:15 AM - The two matches finish relatively quickly with Bill beating Rob in ping-pong and Reuer beating Todd in darts. Now I know
that it was one less game but their darts match took eighteen minutes. That's just fifty-four minutes less than Rob and Tamburo.
12:16 AM - Rob and I agree to play our foosball match since the table is open, it's after midnight and no one has to start a match
if they don't want to. Renae complains that she's ready to go home and Rob responds "It'll be quick."
12:28 AM - Rob is correct and I win 10-1, 10-0. At least he made a nice prediction. He's got that going for him, which is nice.
12:30 AM - All of the locals and the people too sissy to spend the night have left for home. I clean up the garage a little bit
and bring everything inside while Reuer and Drag practice darts. Everyone else is inside playing Mario Kart. Day one of the
Decathlon is officially winding down.
1:30 AM - I spend some time throwing darts and sitting outside. I decide I'm sleepy enough to go upstairs to bed. Hopefully
the living room has settled down a bit and I can get to sleep.
1:47 AM - Matthew, Reuer, Tamburo, Fernando, Peter, Drag, and Erik are watching Super Bad on DVD. I stand for a while and watch
before heading upstairs.
1:57 AM - I get ready for bed and lay down, Emma's already dozing despite the noise. Being kept up late into the night by laughing
and other noise from downstairs: Decathlon Tradition #2. I put in the earplugs that I bought for the occasion and settle in.
Fortunately I fall asleep within twenty minutes and dream of croquet and foosball.